Joining and organization is a bit like dating, commit the time you have for the organization.

Joining an organization is like starting a new romance.  Many times we get involved because we think it might fill a need we have either socially or professionally.  Here you are a few months later and the direction you thought this was going, was wrong and you begin to think that maybe you can change things.  Just don’t.  If it isn’t going someplace you want to go, leave.  Thank them for their time and step gracefully back. 

Sometimes, we see a possibility and we bring it up.  It might seem so glaringly obvious that you can’t believe they haven’t done or tried it.  That is when you need to remember, you are only one member and more than likely the newest. If the other members aren’t interested, leave it alone.

Here is the thing, you don’t get into bed with someone to change them and you don’t join organizations to do that either.  It is alright to be a member for a few months and decide it isn’t for you.  We change our minds, or find areas of a group that make us feel uncomfortable; it happens.  Sometimes it takes a few months, or even a year to discover that it isn’t exactly what you thought it was going to be.

When approached to serve on the board of such in the beginning, wait to do so.  Consider it like getting a promise ring on the first date.  You suddenly find yourself at uncomfortable family dinners with people who are dedicated vegetarians while you are an avid hunter.  Uncle Roy gets falling down drunk and expects to be able to borrow your keys and everyone is wondering why you are so upset and still hungry.  Many times the board will see you have valuable assets for their organization before you have found out that their political affiliations don’t agree with your own.  Sometimes, they don’t understand why you can’t make it to every monthly three meetings.  All they saw when you walked in the door was a perfect candidate to fill a hole in the board.  You have the experience they want but they haven’t taken the time to get to know you either.

Organizations can be fulfilling and important to your private life and career.  I have been a member of several over the years.  I served one group for 5 years and found it a memorable time in my life.  I don’t regret any of the time I spent with them.  Larger groups tend to have more opinions that conflict but if they have been around long enough, they have figured out how to work those things out.  My Grandmother was a woman who avoided large organizations.  She hadn’t had very many positive experiences.  She lacked patience with any kind of manure and was prone to say so.  She would also just leave and that was one of the best lessons she taught me, finding the graceful exit.

So join, just keep an eye on the exits and pace yourself.  Offer what you feel you can afford but don’t commit to too much in the beginning. That way, if you leave; they won’t resent you as much.  Who knows, you might need that connection to the organization in the future.  Remember, always keep a clean back trail.